Baron Blood: He's No Munchausen.

                                                                   Film: Baron Blood
                                                                   Year: 1972
                                                                   Director: Mario Bava
                                                                   Review by: Vincent Daemon

For starters, let me say that there is not a whole lot more that can be said about Mario Bava. The man has had literally volumes of his work dissected and autopsied and pulled apart for all to see. Fans, reviewers, film scholars, and even the occasional detractor, have all written about him and his stylish films to hand cramping ad nauseum. And this is not one of his better films.

The film opens with a loungey-hip muzack style soundtrack (wholly indicative of the time period, and one of the many reasons my father always loathed Italian cinema) playing as we follow a montage of our hero travelling from the U.S. to Austria. He's travelling there to try and auction off some old family property, a castle, that apparently had been the home of one of his ancestors, a vile and twisted baron.

He gets to the castle and we meet the endearing (at least I thought so) Fritz, a leering, peeping dementedly cackling lunatic. He is caught peeping on and by our heros wife. This guy is great, really. You'd just have to see him.

Our hero and his wife decide to do some kind of incantation with a parchment they find to raise the ghost of the baron. They hear a strange sound and Hubby proclaims "I bet it was Fritz and one of his pranks!" Of course, blame the demented Fritz! Ya prick, ya. The next day, however, Fritz is nowhere to be found.

While doing some further investigation, Hubby and Wifey find an odd old painting with creepy eyes that seem to follow them. Like the obvious geniuses they are, this is when they decide to redo the incantation. And this time it takes.

Next we see a horrid ghoul in a graveyard, blood seeping in from under the door, and their magic parchment burst into flame.

The ghoul shows up at a doctors office, gets treatment, then kills said doctor with a scalpel. I found this scene fascinating, because how would a 300 year old ghoul know to go to a modern day doctors office, or even where the hell this office would be at? Really. This ghoul just marches on up to the door and knocks, just like that. Amazing.

Now this ghoul, the Baron, has a neat kind of visual aesthetic going on. His costume more than resembles Vincent Prices from the film Madhouse, with an odd hat and cape arrangement. His face is rotten and meaty-wet, really a not half-bad make up job. Most of the visuals with the Baron, especially the many chase scenes, are where this movie becomes interesting, as Bava and his notorious styling become the focal point. Unfortunately these all degenerate back into the lame Husband abd Wife acting like some kind of Scooby Doo team to find out what all this occult madness is about.

At this pint I'm beginning to miss Fritz. And then . . . FRITZ! The poor demented bastard comes across a body hanged by the Baron and decides to try and stael the corpses ring. I love this guy. The baron shows up, throws Fritz down the stairs, and drags him to a spike-lidded coffin. As he closes the coffin lid, there is a really nice but quick close-up of Fritz's face being punctured by the spikes. It seems Bava has a fetish for this way of death, as it is highly reminiscent of a similar scene from his Black Sunday.

Next we are at the auction, and the castle is won by the creepy and wheelchair bound Joseph Cotton. He immediately gets creepy with Elke Sommer, fondling her fur coat and her hand.

More unexplained chase scenes ensue, and these are essentially the film high points. Classic Bava: the colors and angle, the light-shadow-fog interplays, and the incredibly sexy Elke Sommer looking terrified and panting kind of hotly. All long shadows and twisty wide shots. These scenes repeat themselves over and over again, only in various locations (graveyard, the town, through the castle, etc.). Oddly, every time one of the chase scenes plays out, the song Plan 9, Channel 7 by the Damned seemed to play in the back of my head. If that were the soundtrack it would have been a hell of an improvement over the steady stream of hip loungey muzak jazz.

Did someone mention Fritz? Indeed they did. He is once again blamed as being the possible perpetrator of the crimes. Poor Fritz. Even in death he is mocked and accused.

Eventually our heros meet up with a witch (also incredibly sexy). She tells them that what they have done was foolish, says they need the parchment to fix this problem. However, they burnt it all up, initiating irritated mocking from the witch. She eventually breaks down and says she'll help them. So they go to conjure a ghost wwho speaks through the witch.

THIS IS THE HIGHPOINT OF THE FILM and a really neat set-piece. The spirit shows up in the midst of the almost neon technicolor fire, doing odd and sexy ritualistic gesturations and telling the husband and wife Scooby Doo crew exactly how to vanquish the Baron. This scene really stands out and fully displays everything Bava excels at in one fell swoop. Afterward the Baron and witch have an unseen face-off.

Long story short they end up back with Joseph Cotton, who rises from his wheelchair and we find out is himself now housing the spirit of the Baron. He traps Hubby and Wifey in the dungeon, and begins torturing Hubby. Wifey end up finding Fritz's corpse in the coffin, and drops the witches magic pendant on the corpse. Oddly, it is Joseph Cotton who begins to feel the pain, as Fritz rises up from death (YES!) to take his revenge on the Baron. Several more corpses show up to indulge in the vengeance, our heroes escape, and the witch's spirit can be heard tearing out the Barons heart. The end.

I must add that as usual the women Bava uses for the film are all absolutely stunning. Par for the course and something that really helped me keep my interest, honestly. Especially the witch.

Not a terrible film, but certainly far below other Bava classics in almost every department, I can only really recommend this for the Mario Bava/classic Italian horror cinema compeltist. While dull, with awful music, annoying characters, no gore at all, and the whole nonsensical Scooby-Doo style plot, the film does have its high points (FRITZ!), such as the few moments of classic Bava aesthetic and camera work.

If you've really got nothing better to do one late evening, or are one of the above mentioned completists, you could do far worse than to check this out. Otherwise, for the standard viewer, I'm going to have to recommend a pass.

This film is currently available streaming on Netfilx, along with a whole host of other Bava films, many of which are far better than this.

--- ---- Vincent Daemon's short fiction has appeared in over 24 publications, and he just put his first short story collection, Bury Me In A Nameless Grave: A Collection Of 11, together to get published. He is also editor of the annual Grave Demand magazine, as well as a freelance editor for hire in his down time. He can be found on facebook, his blog The Writings Of A Depraved Mind http://vincentdaemon.blogspot.com/?zx=c2884c7b8567b656 , and contacted at vdaemon13@gmail.com ----

What you'll find when: Megan Is Missing.

                                                               
                                                                Film: Megan Is Missing
                                                                Year: 2011
                                                                Directed by: Michael Goi
                                                                Review by: Vincent Daemon

Megan Is Missing happens to be just about one of the most potent, creep-vibe inducing films I've watched in a long time. The last 22 minutes of goes into horrible places, visually and psychologically. It will drop your jaw and leave you uncomfortable and stunned, and your head filled with a couple of highly disturbing images you may not be able to shake for a few days.

This film will get to you.

A little slow to start, Megan Is Missing follows the exploits of a couple of best friends, party-girl Megan (14) and good-girl Amy (13). As unlikely as their friendship may seem, it ultimately makes sense. Amy is very much a nerdy type, bullied and put down by most of the popular kids, and Megan tries to curb all that and have her friend, the only person she can really trust, included. Really, either one can only understand each other.

The film is largely done using the whole first person P.O.V. methods of webcam, cell phone vids, chat room cams, and eventually news reports. I know many who loathe this style of filmmaking, but it works here, seems in fact almost necessary. The film wouldn't be able to accomplish what it does in quite the same way without it.

The film really picks up when the two girls go to a huge party filled with drinking, drug use, cheap pressured sex and horrible, HORRIBLE overpriviliged high school kids. This is one of the more important scenes in the film, as it perfectly shows the bizarre, confusing dynamic of personalities at play, the complicated and volatile social non-structure wherein both these girls exist, yet on two completely opposite sides of the fence. They are both victims, and being constantly victimized.The innocent Amy is in no way whatsoever prepared, emotionally or psychologically, to deal with the party, it's attendees, and what it has to offer. Eventually she drinks too much, is groped and slapped, and catches her best friend fellating some scumbag. Amy eventually vomits all over two girls making out and leaves the party humiliated and sick.

On an im chat Megan tries to explain to Amy the sexual mechanics from her seriously skewered perception. Through Megan's opening up we come to find she's been treated like a toy of some kind by males since she was a young girl. It's heartbreaking to watch and listen to, with Megan in fact admitting that she will do anything a guy wants her to do, as long as she is told she is loved. Yikes.

Now enter Josh. He's an online entity with whom Megan has started up a flirtatious series of conversations with. He claims to be a 16 year old skate-rat, but is never seen by the girls as his webcam is supposedly broken, so his chats merely involve audio. Megan even arranges to meet this "Josh" but he is a no show.

Eventually however, Josh convinces Megan to meet him behind a local diner. She goes to do this, and is never heard from again.

Amy';s intuition is going haywire, telling her that something awful has happened to Megan, and that Josh may be to blame. So she contacts him online after security cam footage is released on the news, taken from behind the diner. It shows Megan being led away forcefully by an older man. Amy contacts Josh online and begins to ask him questions, to which his response is to merely insult Amy by calling her naive and degrading her horribly.

To make things even worse, all of Megan's friends also blame Amy for the disappearance.

The film cointues to follow this and goes to news footage searching for Megan. The film here goes into an interesting montage of footage from an awful, sensationalistic tv show obviously based on that of the interminably wretched Nancy Grace. The report is running a reenactment of the abduction that is tacky, really foul, and in quite poor taste. Much like the real life Nancy Grace herself, and her program.

Josh this time contacts Amy, admitting what he did to Megan without actually saying it, and threatens Amy in the process.

Next the film shows two photographs of Megan culled from a fetish website, horrific images of the girl being tortured with hard bdsm. Honestly, the pics are hardcore brutal and hard to look at. In fact, from this point on the film becomes an endurance test.

Amy, while looking for her friend and making a video diary, is inadvertantly stalked and taken herself. The last 22 minutes of the movie takes place with footage from Amy's video camera, found discarded in a trash can by police.

I'm not going to detail the rest of what happens, for spoiler reasons and a couple others. However, this is some of the most brutal, potent film I've ever watched. What happens to Amy is every parents, perhaps every human beings, worst nightmare. It is realistic, graphic, and will seriously get under your skin, staying with you long after the credits finish rolling.

In fact, there is an eyes-in-the-camera rape scene that makes the one in Irreversible look like something from Dumbo. Well, maybe not like that, but you get the idea I'm sure. But that is the nice part.

In summary, Megan is Missing is an interesting, psychologically grueling modern day reality fable about the particular difficulties of being young (and possibly) overpriviliged in our society, the damage that can be done from peers and adults alike. Last but not least a most cautionary tale about the dangers of the ease and anonymity of the internet, and all it's possible nefarious uses that reside withing the invisible cracks of the 1's and 0's.

If you're not into p.o.v. films you probably won't like this, but I would advise everyone to give it a chance. A little slow to start, it builds to a payoff that was wholly lacking from something like say A Serbian Film on an emotional/psychological level. And subsequently, emotionally levelled you will be.

Currently, this film is completely banned in New Zealand.

Harrowing and brutal, realistic and oozing with a serious creep-vibe, Megan Is Missing comes to you with both a recommendation and a caveat. This film is for the experienced extreme-horror fan only.

---- Vincent Daemon's short fiction has appeared in over 20 publications, and he is the editor of Grave Demand Magazine. He can be found on facebook, his blog The Writings Of A Depraved Mind http://vincentdaemon.blogspot.com/?zx=dd16cb66ab13f762 , and contacted at vdaemon13@gmail.com ----

The Devils Rock-ed Me Right To Sleep

                                                                   Film: The Devil's Rock
                                                                   Year: 2011
                                                                   Director: Paul Campion
                                                                   Review by: Vincent Daemon

This low rent, snooze inducing piece of trash comes to us by way of New Zealand. And I gotta tell you, this was one of the hardest films I've ever had to watch. It seriously took three seperate veiwing sessions, as the first two lulled me into a horrid celluoid xanax-trance spiral of irrevocable slumber.

Yeah. It's that bad. Which is a shame because the idea is there, it really is.

The film takes place on the eve of WWII's infamous D-DAY. Two ally soldiers are walking along a beach, dodging landmines, when the come across a shadowy Nazi Bunker, from which horrid shrieks are emanating. The enter to find blood and bodies torn to pieces littering the joint. They also find a lone nazi occultist, telling them to get out. He shoots one of the allies and the next 45 minutes is a gruelingly dull verbal and physical face off between the captured ally and the nazi.

The nazi explains that they have summoned a powerful succubus demoness that will be able to wholly help their cause in world domination. Which is interesting, as they did get into the actual historical roots of the occultist nazi agenda a bit, and they were fairly accurate in doing so. However, that didn't last too long and lo and behold, the demoness arrives. Her boring, staid and plasticy make up job is nothing to write home about:

She mindplays the ally, appearing as his dead wife. There is more verbal back and forth. The nazi decieves the zzzzzzzz . . .

Sorry. Merely writing the review brings back some kinda ptsd, and I feel like I'm reliving it all over again. Long story short the film ends with the vanquishing of the "hell whore" as she is referred to throughout a good portion of the film, inducing a serious giggle everytime I heard it. But I don't like writing that because it may entice you to watch it. Really, it's not good-bad, it's bad-bad.

I was hoping, honestly, for some serious, down and dirty Nazisploitation as I have a sick fascination with that sort of thing. Hot chicks in SS Uniforms and bullied pen girls. You know, the good stuff.

Instead I get . . . this.

Like the title of the post says, The Devil's Rock literally rocked me right to sleep. Avoid this dud at all costs. Though if you must watch it you can find it currently streaming on Netfilx.

You have been warned.

Something to dig about: The Burrowers

Film Title: The Burrowers

Year:  2008

                                                                      Director: J.T. Petty

Firstly, let me say that I am honored that Gorehound Mike has brought along on his trusry blog here. It is an honor and a pleasure to be working with him to infirm you about the best of the best, the bloodiest of the bloodiest, and just what the hell NOT to watch. That said, let's begin.

The Burrowers is an interesting piece of film. A western themed horror film that constantly keeps you guessing and thinking, I was not not really all that familiar with it until Gorehound Mike had assigned me the review. It was not what I was expecting, in all honesty. When judgeing by the cover alone, I swore I was being set up to watch yet another zombie film ("please god no!"). I was relieved to find out otherwise, heh.

The film opens with what appears to be a frontier family sitting down in their prarie home for a peaceful dinner. Within moments, something quick, dark, unseen, and decidedly nonhuman shows up tp stalk and kill them.

The family is discovered dead and missing, and within days several frontiersmen (one of which played by stalwart Clancy Brown), along with a seriously racist Calvary brigade, go on a mission to find out who slaughtered the family. The calgary are convinced that it was a tribe of Indians responsible for the crimes, and eventually begin to try and torture a confession out of their captive.

Now, I actually found this to be the most interesting part of the film. The theme of post-Civil War era racism and racial disharmony is felt by every character in the film, whether they are perpetrating, suffering from, recovering from or directly feeling the effects of.

One scene in particular is quite nasty as one of the affoermentioned Indians is having his toes snipped off one by one. Due to the wholly unpredictable terror instilled upon the others by the completely psychopathic  calgary lead, no one can literally do anything at all to help the poor screaming and mutilated bastard. These portions of the film are incredibly well written/acted/directed, and actually plays out as an interesting lead in to everything that follows.

Eventually, the four frontiersmen awake to find the Calvary gone, so they set out on their own, travelling deep into the odd rolling flats of the frontier, empty and desolate land. They finally find what appear to be burrowed crop circles (they are not crop circles, by the way).

The film here begins to drag a bit, but is alive by little flourishes of interesting such as the constant odd little clues and unique bits of (sometimes too obvious) foreshadowing -- many of which involve insects. While the atmosphere is kept pretty thick, and the overall mood is certainly one of a down beat kind of tension, the film seems like it comes to a standstill.

Eventually our scruffy heroes find the body of a female buried -- and still alive, though incommunicable -- discovering an odd scratching/sluicing sound coursing through the inside of her body. I can't really mention too much else here other than to say it plays out in a fairly unique way before it succumbs to being just another monster movie.

Just before the end it finally picks up. I won't toss a bunch of spoilers out there, but I will say that these are some of the more interesting and unique creatures I've seen in recent monster flicks. Being vaguely insectoidal (and possessing of truly weird and discomforting facial features), they are frightening in upclose animatronic and practical fx shots. However, they fail on every level possible when it comes to CG and CG enhancement. Seriously, they look ridiculous. Like something out of a bad video game. (You will all come to fins that I am quite unforgiving toward CG effects of any kind, and I feel my reasons are legit, but that's another rant for another time).

The film ends with a couple of surprises, yet seems to close on a seriously vague note. The racism of the earlier part of the film comes full circle in an almost startling way, and not a whole lot is really explained when the credits start to roll. I'm not sure what the whole point was after viewing. Ancient legends and myth lost to the darker parts of improperly told human history as a final point to cap off the film? Or was this just a lazy, muddy, slapdash ending to come in under budget and on time?

You really should just watch and find out for yourself. It's not like you'd be wasting your time, as this is a very original, blended-genre r film that takes it's chances and, though usually missing the mark, as least it has the balls to TAKE those chances.

Vincent Daemon is a writer of transgressive horror fiction and has been published in various publications and anthologies over 22 times. He is also the creator and editor of Grave Demand Magazine. For info on obtaining his short stories or Grave Demand Magazine please contact him at vdaemon13@gmail.com

Bloody Bloody Bible Camp: Oh Lord Save us all!!

Title: Bloody Bloody Bible Camp

Year: 2012

Director: Vito Trabucco


Months back I`ve been dying to see this film, based upon the awesome throw back cover art.  I contacted Vito and he was cool enough to give this blog an interview.

But so many films are trying to re create the grind house films of the seventies and eighties i.e House of the devil and Sleeper. So I was a little worried this might be another film jumping on the retro band wagon. As always when my exceptions are high by the end of the film not the case here.


The Film:

Unlike alot of lower budget films it never tries to get too smart or clever for its own good. It knows what it is and has no shame or apologies. And its just down right sick raunchy wrong on all levels but will leave your sides hurting with laughter.

What also makes this stand out from other independent films is the direction of photography. Vito displays a keen eye for for cinematography and slick editing and set pieces that gives this lower budget film a more polished look.

So lets talk about the blood in bloody bloody bible camp. The FX are extremely well done, and i`ll even say its on the same level as Tom Savini. The head exploding scene is sure to please every gore hound out there. Some other nasty deaths around the corner but i wont spoil them for you. The gore gags and blood fly fast and furious.

The cast is nothing sort of brilliant with genre favorites Reggie Bannister and Tim Sullivan at the helm. Reggie is in top form and gives the materiel his all without going over the top cartoonish. Sullivan plays Sister Mary Chopper and while yes he is outrageous at times it works well with the slashers he`s parodying. But I would be remiss not to mention the supporting cast who is equally good. Matthew Aidan is the stand out as the uber d-bag Tad. He is a greatest hits of every eighties jock dick you`ve seen in films.. His delivers his lines with great comedy timing and also with a good sense of physical comedy. I strongly feel with given the right breaks could be a house hold name. Cult film actor/director David Hayes also makes a enjoyable and funny cameo. If you guys never seen his film "Back woods" I implore you to seek it out.

Ex porn star Ron Jeremy makes a screamingly funny cameo as no less then Jesus Christ himself. What can I say its so random but it works really really well.  I know there is alot of other talents in the cast I did not mention but I feel everyone did a bang up job.

The Bottom Line:  Vito has taken all the fun of seventies and eighties horror slashers and boiled it down into one very enjoyable flick. This is the perfect movie to watch with a group of friends and a keg or two.

As the tag line says Heaven isnt for everyone expect you. Well folks if you like gore, tities, fart jokes, , masturbation jokes and Jesus Christ himself then this film is must certainly for YOU.

This can be found on Amazon.com - Buy this film you wont be disappointed.

Friedkin gets Buggy!

Title: Bug

Year: 2006

Director: William Friedkin

William Friedkin back in the day he could do no wrong with film lovers. He scored big with hits like Boys in the Band, The French Connection, Cruising and to horror lovers The Exorcist which even today is considered the scariest movie of all time.  Like so many great directors his latest out put is spotty at best. When the "buzz" around Bug was mainly horrible I just skipped over it. But thanks to a friends telling me to give it a look at and the miracle of netflix streaming and some time to kill I gave it a look at.

         I`m glad I did.

Be warned if your looking for a fast paced horror film with music video style edits and a murder every two seconds then this may not be for you. Bug starts out at a crawl, but gives us a nice in depth character study of two very different yet broken people and there struggles. But what starts out as a drama quickly takes a hard left turn into creepville and it only gets worse-much worse.

Gore hounds you`ll have to wait til towards the end but when the red stuff starts to flow it will not be disappointed. Watching Shannon self mutilate himself is cringe worthy and something you wont likely to forget. I wont spoil it, but there is some cringe worthy moments that will pleasure even the most jaded film lover.

Bug is based on a stage play and it shows in the film, as there is very few scenes outside of Ashley Judds motel room and even with limited scenery it doesn't hamper the films watchablity.
 The final set piece in the bug proof motel is nothing short of disturbing and visually amazing. Its really something that has stuck with me since.

This is not without its flaws, firstly some of the scenes between Judd and Shannon are at times laughable.
The sex scene between her and Michael Shannon is very strange and he delivers thee most unbelievable pick up line to get her in bed..And it works?? Its almost so bad you gotta see to believe.

Secondly I see they tried to dirty up Judd to make her less pretty and while she looks trashy its almost impossible to fully buy her white trash down and out character. She still is the same pretty actress. But thats really not the fault of either director or Judd herself.

And scenery is truly chewed at great length by both Judd and Shannon. They are over the top at points where the director should have reined them in.

Where the film is weak its made up for in other areas. Friedkin has done a rare job at filming people spiraling into deepest blackest madness and were there with them at every weird and painful moment. And it does get painful! The amount of tension that is created is on par with Hitchcock and will leave you guessing at every twisted turn.  What really sells this film for me is the ambiguous nature and that at the end we the audience are left to make up our own minds. Is there really government planted "bugs" or are both people just mentally broken to the point of no return? You decide.

Though not popular when it came out, I think people are finally starting to see this as Friedkin in top form. Bug will certainly get under your skin and lay its egg sacks in you. So check it out, or the government may be after YOU

AND IM BACK!! BASKET CASE UK STEELBOX EXCLUSIVE PREVIEW!!!

Hey fans! I`m back and i`ll be blogging regularly now.

From Second Sight comes the Basket Case Trilogy Steelbox!!

I`m here to tell you guys this set rocks!! Heres the Breakdown of the set.

For the first time ever all three films are together in one place package. Speaking of nice packages-brand new artwork graces the cover by famed UK artist Graham Humphreys.

DISCS 1 Basket Case part 1

The first Basket Case was blown up for its original release to look like 35mm. For the set its presented in its original aspect ratio and even a wonderful new high def treatment. The blood and gore never looked so good!

SPECIAL FEATURES: The gem on this disc is the feature length documentary "Whats in the Basket" produced just for this set. Its a very well produced with lively interviews from the survivors of the series. Not only does it take a look at the first film but goes in depth with the other two films and hmmm maybe a part four? You`ll have to see to find out! This only makes this set worth the money!

Also Exclusive to this set is a Mini doc. on artist Graham Humphreys.

All other features are carried over from the Something Weird release, Intro, Auto commentary Finding Hotel Broslin Trailers etc.

Discs 2,3

First time on Blu Ray both Basket Case 2 and 3 have never looked better. Taken from there original 35mm prints Second sight has masterfully transferred both prints to high def. The blacks are deep with no grain or scratches. The Sound is also well done because you need to hear those screams on your surround sound!

Bottom Line: This is a great collection to have in your collection. Worried you cant play it on your player...FEAR NOT- Its region 0 so it`ll play on any blu ray. So Americans can enjoy this set as well...

Pick up your copy at   http://www.secondsightfilms.co.uk/
thanks to second sight for sending over a copy!!! u guys rock!